Bonked

I bonked today.  Badly.
(Bonking is an athletic term, used widely by cyclists.  It means reaching a point where your body runs out of fuel.).
It got to the point that turning one more pedal stroke seems like a huge effort.  You're simply out of energy.  Bonking also has a psychological dynamic: when you bonk, your decision making ability diminishes, you're completely focused on finishing, convinced that you can't.  Your mind and body just don't cooperate.
A lot of reasons caused my particular bonk.
Yesterday was a very hard, long, and hilly day.  It had the three h's: humidity, hills, and headwind.  It was also hotter than it's been for the last few weeks, which I didn't notice.  Add to that, there was some confusion with our support vehicles, so the water and fruit stop 30 miles in wasn't there.  We didn't know about this, so we kept cycling, thinking fresh water and food were around the next corner.  I think that was the last straw.  I made it through yesterday OK, but paid for it today.  About 50 miles into a 76 mile ride, I was ready to throw in the towel.  I was cooked.  Thanks to friends, I got pulled in and finished the ride.  I drank lots, ate a good dinner, swam in the pool to cool down, and am taking it easy tonight.  With a few easier days ahead, I should finish just fine (Lord willing.)

I bonked because I didn't eat or drink enough.  And every time I say that I won't make that mistake again, I fall into the bonk trap.
I wonder how many of us live with a kind of perpetual spiritual bonk.  We feed and pay attention to God when we need him, but neglect those things the rest of the time.  Spiritual bonking affects our thinking, our feelings, and our endurance.  Like any relationship, our relationship with God needs as much intentional attention as a cyclist like me need food and water.
Without that attention and regular contact with Him, we'll all spiritually bonk.